T-minus 6 days and counting. Here I sit in a nearly empty house. All but a couple of pieces of furniture are gone. I can’t even begin to tell you what I am feeling right now. I don’t even think I know myself. It has been a …… a …… hmm I can’t even come up with an adjective on how to describe these past 48 hrs. You see I hired an estate liquidator to come in and help sell what was left after I tried to have my own sale. I am a bit overwhelmed with all of this. Watching strangers come in and take away your life.
The selling part wasn’t too bad to deal with. It was kind of freeing to make a decision on what to sell something for and to “let it go”. However, once it came to having the liquidators come in, and I had to just sit back and watch everything go away, was a bit harder. The feeling of losing control of your life. Your past, your identity is a bit much. The worst part of it all was earlier today (well actually yesterday now that it is 1 am) when I came home from work and even more was gone. Then… Then the real cleanout came. It was either give away what is left or it goes in the dumpster. That is not an easy thing to deal with. The 30 yard roll of I got that most people didn’t think I needed is chalk full of my stuff.
Having to see it just gone and devalued like that might very well be one of the hardest things I have had to deal with. I suppose, well not suppose, I know that is part of why I am doing this. I need to let go and move on. Now don’t be fooled, I have still kept some stuff but the storage unit is far from being as full as I and the people who know me thought it would be.
So as this chapter in my life is coming to a close and I am sad to see it end, a new one is starting. The fear and excitement of the unknown is now what I have to focus on. The ride is before me and I must turn the last page and prepare for what comes next. I hope you continue to follow me on this journey of discovery and I can’t wait to share it all with you. I also wanted to take a moment to thank all of you who stopped at the house and listened to me talk about Ride 2 Recovery and my ride. The encouraging words that you all gave me is helping me through all of this. Please let me know what you are thinking in the comments. Take care and see you on the road.